As usual, when I’m at my parents’ house and someone is acting up – off he goes to time out…

“You have to be more patience…” said my Dad as I sent Lil’ A to time out for the 100th times because he thinks jumping on top of piles of his old clothes that I just neatly folded is so much fun than climbing up the windows railing, which got him several warnings already. “You will have more headache when he’s a teenager…” Dad went on.

From the way my Dad was talking I can tell he was 90% teasing me – because he knows Lil’ A can drives me insane for sure.

“You used to make us standing in the corner with one leg up – that is time out!” as I remember one of those dreadful childhood punishments.”And remember your big black belt? That belt and me were best friend, right?” Then we all started laughing.

“Yes, but it’s different now! We love our grandson more than we love you!” my Mom chimed in.

Maybe she’s right…because my Mom and I always had a fit about how I discipline Lil’ A. In her eyes I’m a mean mommy when she had a power pinch that used to gave my thighs ‘badges’ that will last for weeks! She’s been acting as Lil’ A’s attorney/defender, whatever you wanna call it since we moved back to Indonesia so of course the boy will always tried to seek her help when he’s in trouble! Sometimes she would even stepped in and ‘rescued’ Lil’ A from his time out and I’ll be fuming at her.

With my Dad, I can still reasons with him that time out is necessary at this stage along with taking away the little boy’s privileges such as his toys/movie(s) after counting to three. He gets me but not my Mom!

When I was little, corporal punishments were daily part of our lives like so many others who grew up in the 70s – 80s (and prior?) and since I wasn’t exactly the sweetest little girl growing up – that belt became my friend with some other physical punishments. Until one day I think I was in 4th grade, too caught up in play time and didn’t realized it was already dark…too scared to come home, I hid in a small chicken barn a few houses down the block.

Oh did that caused panic to my parents! Not only them some of the neighbors also helped trying to find me. I hid for hours, can’t remember how long but someone did found me – she took me to her house, gave me a cup of hot tea. I cried and begged her not to tell my Dad because I will be in deep trouble.

Eventually, I came home and was scared to death but instead of getting my usual ole’ beating, my Dad picked me up, sat me on his lap and apologized to me. He got tears in his eyes, he just held me for the longest time and kept telling me he loves me. Since that night – the corporal punishments stop in our household but I still remember them.

I wouldn’t want Lil’ A to have that kind of fears, besides physical punishments will only hurt for a few seconds or minutes and eventually the child will learn how not to feel them. So if I have to be a mean mommy and stick to my gun when I said NO then be it…he can sit and cried his head off but he will never meet that belt!

So, how do you discipline your child, especially toddler? Share here what works and what’s not working for you.

From this:

“Stop checking your phone, Mommy!”

Lil’ A’s words felt like a punch last night as I lay next to him and replying to some stuffs on Twitter.

Guilty as charged, I apologized to him and asked “You don’t like Mommy checking her phone too much?” and he replied “I don’t like it…“

Another guilty pang inside!

Two years ago – when I took that picture above – I actually made fun of my family who were already using Blackberry and thought it’s way too complicated for me. Then just last year, my family conspiracy  was to sucked me into their circle of Blackberry user and gifted me one for my birthday. That’s the end of my regular phone days!

Yes, it’s awesome to be able to check your emails, twitter, marketbooking – err I meant facebooking,  even approved comments on my blog through this little gadget. Not to mention I can chat with DH anytime we need to – uhm no, I’m not sharing my PIN number, thank you very much! There’s just so much one can do with this phone and sucked the life out of you!

But as lay there in bed with my 3.5 years old little man…he’s all there! In the present with me, connected with me, enjoying our cuddle times so when his Mommy was still trying to reply to some tweets…it sure doesn’t seems fair huh?! Yeah, guilty…guilty…guitly!

It’s another story for DH, he works with his Blackberry too much! In his field of work, his phone is rarely if never get turned off!

So I turned my phone off – witnessed by Lil’ A, put it aside and pull him closer and gave him a kiss, vowed to myself that I will do a temporary separation from this gadget and put a curfew on it!

Today, I’m taking Lil’ A to see a circus and yes, the darn phone will stay at home!

Just when I thought we had escaped from the forest of the screaming-meltdown-tantrums from hell-phase that everyone calls the sweet Terrible Two…

Please don’t let this sweet face fool you!  Yes, he can be as sweet as honey when he wants to! But lately I wonder where did that sweetness hide?

It have to be his way or the high way!

He talks back – already! Told me to stop talking *triple gasps!* Criticizing my Mommy skill by saying “Not like that Mommy!” or “No…this way, Mommy!”

The boy stripped himself naked every chance he got!

Pushing every ounce of patience this Mommy already lack off.

The screams – oh the screams the piercing painful screams had returned from the cave of Terrible Two. I’m sure by now my hearing has been impaired!

So, terrible two…..eat your heart out!

The main reason for our weekend getaway was actually The Wiggles!

Too bad I found out about their concert in Singapore a tad too late and all the front row seats were sold out! Gasp! I did got us some tickets – not the best seats available – but I was excited for Lil’ A anyway. The Wiggles concert in Singapore was scheduled for Saturday (June 5th, 2010)  – Sunday (June 6th, 2010) with 2 shows on Saturday.

My brother, Reggy was kind enough to go with us since DH was stuck with work in Jakarta and couldn’t make it.

By the time we got to the venue, Singapore Indoor Stadium, it was slightly raining but that doesn’t stop all the parents from bringing their little ones.

Thanks God they didn’t use the whole stadium like I thought they would – or else they would just look like tiny ants from our seats – the seats were quickly packed and the show started almost on time.

It was so much fun with the theme of The Wiggles Circus – it was loaded with circus-a-like actions – even the parents got to enjoy it.

Lil’ A did so good considering that was his very first concert ever, he was busy dancing & clapping his hands.

We were so surprised when The Wiggles themselves plus Captain Feathersword and some of their crews marched up the podium where we were seated and waved also shook hands with people. My brother, Reggy who was snapping pictures for me had my telephoto zoom lens and of course it was hard to snap their picture when they were that close. They circled our rows and I lift Lil’ A on my lap so he can look up and waved.

Murray – the red Wiggles actually stopped and shook Lil’ A’s hand. Double surprise! Too bad it happened way too fast and we didn’t have a point & shoot camera to capture that moment. Lil’ A was so happy he said “Murray shook my hand, Mommy! My hand is hot!” LOL

After the show was over Lil’ A said “More Wiggles…more Wiggles”.  It was impossible to find a cab after so the three of us happily took the MRT (subway) back to the hotel.

Such a fun concert!

One of the scary perk of living in an apartment is the height! I kid you not we’re on the 30th floor…

On Sunday, while I was away DH got to spent some bonding time with Lil’ A.

Little that we know their times together will involved, security, cell phone and a balcony!

Yeah, DH was playing with Lil’ A in his toy room when his cell phone rang. He left Lil’ A to answer the call from work and didn’t realize that someone already sneaked out of the room.

Couple of minutes later DH started to get suspicious because Lil’ A was mighty quiet! He went to the toy room…the little monkey wasn’t there anymore.

He found him in our bedroom… outside at the balcony, just squatting down with a huge mighty ‘I’m-in-deep-trouble‘ grin on his face.

He had just threw DH’s century old blackberry phone from work that he never use anyway outside the balcony! Is it just a normal toddler curiosity or this one just having too much fun dropping things out? He does this at my mom’s house too, from the second floor!

Later, security guy came up and gave DH a warning about the incident. Oh believe me someone got a very strong warning and time out!

I couldn’t care less about the cell phone but it freaked me out to think that Lil’ A can open the sliding door to our balcony – when we thought the lock was pretty complicated for his little fingers. We had another sliding door with lock installed in the living room – for the balcony – but not our room. His bedroom and toy room have safety railings covering the windows but we didn’t child proof the balcony in our room. Huge mistake! So, DH is stopping by Ace Hardware today after work to find some kind of child-proof lock. No, we better not gamble on “Oh he won’t do that…” scenario. I had read enough stories of horror apartment accidents involving children in this city to make me paranoid!

So people, if you have one curious toddler like we does, you better double checks your bolts and locks!

In between playing around with a new design for Tatter Scoops and juggling everyday life, thought I’d post some pictures of my umbrella boy.

Oh the joy of playing in the rain!

One of the things I noticed on local TV in Indonesia is the ferocity of formula commercials – specifically the toddler formula – not the baby kinds.

While I was waiting to renew passport last week – out of boredom – I counted these commercials being aired on TV. 10 different formula commercials within an hour of a morning show. Shocking!

Not only on TV, parents are being constantly bombarded with formulas through magazines & newspaper ads also at the supermarkets. I’m not talking just formula for babies but mainly for toddlers.

This may have been a ‘normal’ practice in Indonesia for years on end now but I just never notice it before I became a mom.

Whenever I went to the groceries, on my way to pick up UHT Milk for Lil’ A, I always – and I mean ALWAYS being stopped by these formula associates offering me to try their magic-vitamins-loaded-formula-that-will-make-your-child-a-genius! Usually I managed to politely decline them but there were times when I was just being a smart ass and challenged them in their knowledge about these formulas by telling them regular milk will makes my son just as smart!

He’s been on UHT milk since we first got here and Lil’ A loves it, we tried a local pasteurized brand once but it gave him an upset stomach. He doesn’t really like chocolate milk, thanks God! It was harder in China when the whole milk scandal exploded in 2008 – we had to buy imported UHT Milk from New Zealand there.

Sometimes I wonder if these formula fed babies/toddlers in Jakarta are so much chubbier because of the highly consumptions of these ‘magic milk’?

IMHO, formula is loaded with sugars! Don’t believe me? Go read the ingredient list. That’s what makes these kids so attached to their formulas. I know I might get stoned for this…but breast milk and pasteurized milk are way better than these formulas. Had a good laugh when I saw one commercial that claimed they had added colostrums. How on earth?!

Since Lil’ A was a preemie baby and his weight went down after a week of staying at NICU, I had to combine breast milk plus special formula for preemie. He then was breastfed for 8 good months (he stopped nursing himself and that was one of the saddest times of my life!) and 5 months on formula. Like AAP recommended, he’s off formula when he turned 1 year old.

Just as parents being bombarded with these mega millions industry here, I really think we as parents needs to do a little more digging before giving formulas to our kiddos. And hey, they are expensive! Pasteurized and UHT milk are much cheaper.

As usual Lil’ A and I had our little chat before bedtime, snuggling in bed, suddenly he mentioned his Grandpa and asked where he is. “Grandpa is with Grandma in Florida, remember?” I answered. Silent for a minute then as if a light bulb just switched in his mind he said “Yes, with Mimi!” (Mimi is DH’s grandmother).

I asked if if he remember our long flight to Florida from Jakarta in November 2008, just him and his Mommy boarded the world’s biggest aircraft. He couldn’t remember it, granted, he was only less than 2 years old back then (23 months actually!).

Then out of the blue he said something that brought me to tears “A plays piano with Grandma!” At Mimi’s house she have this organ and just about every grandchildren and great grandchildren she have were once sitting by the organ playing some tunes at some point of their lives. So for Lil’ A to remember this is truly amazing, again he wasn’t even 2 back then! He can actually recollects the memories of playing in Mimi’s big backyard, of feeding the many squirrels with peanuts.

We talked about him sitting on Grandpa’s back after our Thanksgiving Day dinner…

he even remember how Grandpa used to cook him pancakes! I’m sure Grandpa will have a smile on his face if he read this remembering what a handful his youngest grandson was hahaha.

He continued to surprised me with the flooding of memories he had shared with his Grandma, Grandpa, Mimi and Great Aunt Wanda in 2008. He clearly remember our trip to the beach,

to the playgrounds and how he slide down the big yellow slide,

reading books with Grandma.

All these brought back warm memories of my great inlaws and what a wonderful people they are and how much I miss them.

Lil’ A and I laughed as he told me  about his McQueen birthday cake,

of the silly strings Grandma shoot at him…he even remembers the pinata!

He then said something that really pull my heartstrings…”We go see Grandma & Grandpa in Florida, Mommy with Daddy and Oma…” he wants my mother to come to Florida too!

How often do we remember bits and pieces of our 2nd birthday is beyond me! I could barely remember some things from a few days ago!

Grandma, Grandpa, Mimi & Great Aunt Wanda…Lil’ A love you and missing you all so much!

Puzzled! Yes, that’s how I feel lately…you see, Lil’ A was a winter baby. Born 5 weeks early on December 7, 2006. He was a hardcore winter baby meaning the cold weather never used to bother him! When we were in China, living in an apartment that doesn’t have a central heating system and winter time was pretty mean he would still be a-okay-wondering around inside with just a shirt while his Mommy bundled up with thick sweater and socks.

Well not anymore! Lately he will tell me he’s cold even just riding in a car with the Air Con fully blasting.

Could it be he had adjusted to the icky-hot-humid-weather of Indonesia that drives his Mommy nuts? Btw, this boy never have heat rashes even with all his running around half naked around his Oma’s house. Occasionally he’ll have diaper pull-ups rash on his tiny bums but no heat rashes like his Mommy always suffer. Maybe he did adjusted, after-all, he’s always guzzled down more watered-down orange juice than anyone can ever imagine that’s why my family calls him a walking ‘jet-pump’ (what Indonesians calls a pumping water machine).

Where did my winter baby go…I have no idea but one thing for sure is Mommy will have to start carrying a sweater for him just for the rides in car/taxi.

So last night while lying in bed with Lil’ A he said something that totally blew me away (oh and he have said a lot of things that blew me away lately!)

“Mommy, A had a bad dream last night!” this coming from my 3 years old mouth and it stunned me not only that he said it in a full sentence but then he was able to describe the dream “A was in a train and the train sinking, Mommy”.

Okay, maybe he had watched too many Polar Express and yes, he is train-crazed but had moved on from Thomas to just everyday trains (and planes!) and there was a scene where the train almost sinks in a frozen lake.

This is the first time he had describe a dream and I am taken by it.

My only answer to him was “It’s okay, pumpkin…bad dreams are not real they are just stories of your sleep, sometimes you will get  good dreams, sometimes you will have bad dreams.” As I can’t think of any better answer then I pulled him into my arms holding him and planted a kiss (or two!) while he nestled his curly head on my collar bone. Aaah….if only Mommy can protect you in your dreams too.